Escada, Louis Vouitton, Gucci, Prada, BCBG, etc…

Labels are for filing. Labels are for clothing. Labels are not for people. ~ Martina Navratilova

To label or not to label… that is the question. I’m speaking of people, not fashion. 

When we are born in a hospital, we are given a cute little label on a plastic ID bracelet. Our surname is usually written on the label so the hospital staff knows which of the waiting mothers to take us to once we’re ready to be held, loved and fed. A baby has no idea that a label is affixed to him or her. Our mothers would probably recognize us without the label if they were allowed to walk into the hospital nursery. Since the hospital staff cannot remember who each baby belongs to and could give us to the wrong mother, a name label seems essential.

When a person dies, the morgue gives the body a label. This label or toe tag is hanging from a string with identifying information. This assures that the body is given the right autopsy or other services before being transferred to the burial agency the family has paid to provide final arrangements. I don’t know if it happens often in real life, but movies like to show families grieving the wrong body because someone goofed up the label.

In between birth and death, labels are thrown into a huge hat of life and everyone is supposed to reach in and pull out an identifying label. This hat will go around throughout one’s lifetime as we go through many changes in life that require us to pick a label. Most of us will have the same labels at some point, e.g. baby, toddler, child, girl/boy, student, adolescent, young/old, man/woman, Black/White, girlfriend/boyfriend, wife/husband, mother/father, grandmother/grandfather, employee, homeowner, taxpayer, and senior citizen. Others may earn labels they are proud to have such as doctor, Nobel Peace Prize winner, teacher, President of the United States of America, mentor, hero, etc. Some labels can cost you and determine your standing in life, e.g. smoker, criminal, drunk driver, child abuser, drug addict, minority, etc.

Then, there are those labels that seem to correlate with controversy. Why is there so much controversy, secretiveness, blasphemy, and bigotry surrounding the gay, homosexual, lesbian, bisexual, transsexual, transgendered, and queer labels? Why is it that the more open the topics surrounding LGBTQ matters become, the more often that those who are not gay have to use the “straight” label?

It used to be that people automatically assumed everyone was straight because being gay was such a taboo that only the bravest rebels would dare label themselves as gay. Being straight was automatic and the gay population were supposed to use labels so they could be placed into society’s “closeted because something is wrong” section.

As a straight person who has been an advocate of LGBTQ rights, I was shocked when a few people asked me if I’m gay. Frankly, I was somewhat offended because I grew up in the “straight is normal” society that protects straight people from having to defend or explain their sexual identity. I always thought my sexual orientation was obvious and that I was a part of the “norm” or the majority that didn’t need to use a label.

After realizing that I was reacting in an offended manner because society has made all of us think that being gay equates to something negative, bad, sinful, or wrong, I noticed that my sexual identity questioners would do the politically correct song and dance by telling me that it would be ok and wouldn’t matter if I was gay. Of course, my response is, “why ask if it’s ok and does not matter?”

I have never asked anyone if they are gay just for the sake of knowing so that I can tell them it’s ok and does not matter. For health reasons, I have asked men I’ve dated about their sexual history because I feel I have a right to know. [NOTE: Talking about sexual health is another blog.] 

Well, I gave myself the “heterosexual rebel” label when I joined the crusade to fight against the society that discriminates and thrives on ostracizing and discriminating against those who don’t fit society’s norm (whatever the hell norm really means). I am confident enough in my straightness that I can rattle the minds of other straight people to make them realize that I am the same person just as the gay person is the same regardless of the label ascribed by self or by society. 

My poem “Sexual Identity: [x] NA (not applicable)” is in the anthology and was inspired by my thoughts on labels.  www.jafansta.com/StepIntoMyShoes_LGBTQ_Anthology.aspx

 

In 2011, the rights of gays in the military, marriage, family, adoption, workplace, and in schools are continuously improving. As this happens, there seems to be a change in people’s attitude about attaching a gay label as a sign of pride. Thus, the abundance of Gay Pride and Rainbow Pride parades, bumper stickers, marches, and other activism. PFLAG members are proud to use labels for their loved ones by saying, “my son is gay”, “my mom is lesbian” or “my uncle is queer.” Gays are proud to announce they are lesbian, bisexual, transsexual, or queer. There are still many who would prefer to stay in the closet or remain secretive because they don’t want to have a label affixed so that society can clump them into a category that is still not completely accepted. 

I’ve noticed many gays are using the queer label, which they feel covers anything they want to be. [NOTE: Come back to read another blog that discusses queer.]

In thinking about how society has evolved with regards to the LGBTQ population and its labels, do you feel labels are needed for people? Are they useful with a positive message or useless with negative connotations? Should we leave labeling to the designers for clothing, shoes, purses, cologne, and luggage?  

 

Peacefully yours!